Leave a message.
I'll call you back.
hi, Perry, it's me,
Julia. Uh...
i--i just called to talk,
uh, obviously, ha,
but you're not there.
obviously.
uh, so...
basically, I just
wanted to say I'm sorry,
uh, about everything.
about making things
more difficult
than they needed to be.
I just, um...
I'd really like
to see you and talk.
this whole week's been...
I haven't even
been able to write.
I have to write this
stupid "tell us about
yourself" essay
for a scholarship
application.
I'm completely blocked
and--and...
can you pick up
if you're there?
ok, well, uh, mainly
I just want to know
that you're ok.
so...call me. Bye.
Good job, buddy.
but you got some
test papers to
finish up, don't you?
for Ms. lo?
no...well, ok, I'll do it.
unh!
these 2 here?
atta boy.
oh, um, I have some
of Owen's pages here.
the--the testing center
was supposed to call
and confirm him for
this week. Did they?
no, not while I was here.
hmm.
you know what?
I should trade places
with Owen.
I'll take
his dyslexia test
and he can fill out my
scholarship application.
what is that,
the millennium thing?
yeah. They pick
5 area college students
and pay for room, board,
tuition for a year.
well, "filling out"
doesn't sound so hard.
it's an essay
on who you are,
and your philosophy
on the universe.
Bailey, it takes most
people, like, their life
to figure
that stuff out,
not 3 days and
"postmark by midnight."
you're on this thing
for 3 more days?
see, I was hoping
maybe we could...
go to the movies
or something, you know.
take Owen and claud
along with us.
not till I figure
out my entire future.
anyway, Claudia's
seeing, uh, Cody
every night, so--
she didn't tell me that.
she have to?
I mean, she's not
grounded anymore,
is she?
Bailey, maybe
you should give her
her space for a while.
yeah. Don't worry.
Claudia and I
are under control.
What did you do?!
ha. You look incredible!
really?
what did you do?!
wow! Red!
is that a rinse?
rapacious red.
oh, it was so easy.
can I have red hair?
no! No, you can't have
red hair! Claudia!
I get I, bay.
you don't like it.
actually, you look...
what? Did Cody tell you
to do this?
did Cody tell me
to do this?
because I know you're too
smart to ruin your hair
for some idiot who's trying
to turn you into something
that you're not.
Bailey!
shut up, Bailey!
just shut up.
♪ Everybody wants to live ♪
♪ like they wanna live ♪
♪ and everybody
wants to love ♪
♪ like they wanna love ♪
♪ and everybody
wants to be ♪
♪ closer to free ♪
(Kirsten laughs)
that's it, Diana.
oh, I think
she's exceptional.
I think she's brilliant.
she was actually trying
to say the word "apple"
last night.
(imitates baby-talk)
"hopa"..."hopa"...
and that's "apple"
in what? Urdu?
I'm not listening
to you.
we're not listening
to him, are we?
'cause I think
you're brilliant.
if this were a nation
of one-year-olds,
you would be a leader
to your people--
like Hillary Clinton.
or Elizabeth dole.
can you tell what her
politics are just by
how she's lying there?
hey, this is your child
I'm admiring, mister.
kind of like ours,
right now.
dumb thing to say. Dumb.
no, I know.
I know that you
meant something nice,
but there's an actual
mother out there
whose baby Diana
really is.
so, yeah...
dumb thing to say.
I'm sorry. Really.
as long as you're
mine, anyway.
And she does love you.
and she feels you
loving her.
you know that, right?
I want to.
maybe a little.
Laa!
ohh.
hi.
sorry I'm late.
Thanks for calling me back.
this essay's been completely--
Julia...
I didn't come here to
talk about your essay.
right.
look, Perry, I'm sorry.
really, I am.
what happened with us was--
a mistake?
no.
I don't know.
come on, Julia,
you kissed me.
and you and I both
know that you're
not gay.
being gay has nothing
to do with it.
look, don't be
naive about this--
I'm not. I just...
look, I know I'm not gay,
but I don't think that's
what this is about.
then why'd you kiss me?
I don't know.
I just--i...
I love the way I feel
when I'm with you.
you know?
I love...Talking to you
and writing with you and...
even arguing with you
has had its moments, so...
I guess I got confused
and I kissed you
and I'm sorry...
not that it happened,
but that things got so
weird between us afterwards,
'cause if it weren't for you,
I wouldn't be writing again.
Julia--
I wouldn't be moving
on with my life.
but I haven't
done anything.
that's all you.
yeah.
when I'm with you.
and so that's
what I want now.
I want for us
to be friends again.
I want for us to drink
too much coffee
together,
and have these impossible
conversations and...
maybe even for you
to help me
with this stupid
scholarship essay.
Let me have it.
"Convince the stranger,
in the coming
millennium,
"you will bring into
the world something
that would not have been
there without you."
they take themselves
very seriously.
yes, I know.
I'm serious, Charlie.
you have to do something
about Bailey.
he's out of control.
Mr. control's
out of control?
I mean, correct me
if I'm wrong here, but you
are my legal guardian.
so he has no right
to tell me what to do,
or how to live,
or what time to come home.
that bad, huh?
Charlie, he's so set on
proving that he can do it all--
you know, do us all--
he's not even Bailey anymore.
well, he's under a lot
of pressure, claud.
yeah, well, we all are.
so you can either
get him off my back or...
get your couch made out
for me,
because if I have to spend
one more second under
his fat, little thumb...
well, number one,
you're welcome anytime,
and you know that.
but number two:
be patient with him, ok?
because he actually
needs you right now.
and somebody's gotta
keep an eye on him
or he's gonna need
a bypass by the time
he's 21.
ok?
will you do that for me?
as a personal favor?
you owe me.
big time.
you got it.
and, claud...
you look great.
thanks.
ok, picture this:
mountaintops, sunrise,
sonoma heights,
me in a pup tent,
and my laptop plugged
into the camper's friend
power source at the site.
I'm picturing.
I'm confused,
but I'm picturing.
Bailey, I've got
to get away.
I mean, if I'm gonna have
to deal with all these
deep "why are you here"
type questions,
I can't do it where...
where I spend
part of every day
looking for Owen's
lost homework.
or rolling up my socks
and putting them
in a drawer.
sonoma what?
heights.
it's where I went
for that--that dig
for geology.
god, that spot
is so beautiful.
I just keep thinking,
you know,
if can get back there
for just one day,
one night,
I could blast out
this essay
and finally hear
my own voice,
you know?
I'm still waiting
for the dumb part.
everything
you've said so far
is really smart.
oh, thank you.
(doorbell rings)
there's always
something.
I'll run 'em off
the property,
whoever it is.
Hey, Bailey.
Daphne.
how you doin'?
doin' good?
is--is Charlie home?
um...
(sighs heavily)
why don't you come in
and grab a drink or something?
I'll call around and see
if I can find Charlie.
no. Why don't you just
tell me where he lives?
Sarah! Hi!
Daphne.
hi.
um, look, does he still
teach at school?
yeah, sure.
ok, good.
then I'll just, um...
yeah, I'll just--
I'll catch him there.
you know what,
Daphne? Wait.
it's really nice
to see you two.
bye.
you didn't...
tell her that
Charlie's back together
with Kirsten?
I wasn't gonna just
drop it on her like that.
that's for Charlie to do.
he's gotta tell her
the way he wants.
what did she say?
did she say why
she was here?
yes. Can I please speak
with Mr. salinger?
and even if he's with his class,
could you please interrupt him?
a field trip?
swell.
hey, jule, wait up.
you ok?
no. It's bad enough
o'Neil wants me to rewrite
the story again,
but the notes
she gave me are crazy,
like she didn't even read it.
I did. I thought
it was great.
plus,
I've got this millennium
application essay to write.
when am I supposed to sleep?
maybe I'll just give o'Neil
the same version,
let her flunk me.
yeah, right.
flunk the best writer
in class?
aside from me,
of course.
whoa. Josh,
you have just said
10 supportive things
to me in a row.
why are you still
so nice to me?
you really wanna know?
uh-huh.
it's research
for a story
I'm writing.
yeah. It's about
this guy--
sort of unprepossessing,
neurotic,
but in a good way,
guy who's got a problem.
other than being neurotic?
yeah. See,
there's this woman--
this mysterious,
haunted, beautiful--
ok.
and he just can't stop
asking her out,
no matter how many times
she says no.
so my being nice to you
is pure research.
maybe it's not him
who's being neurotic.
maybe it's her.
you think?
well, it seems
she keeps going
for the wrong people.
I don't know why.
maybe 'cause she doesn't
think she deserves
someone that nice.
so what--what happens
in the end?
does he ask her out again?
well, it's your story,
but if I were him,
I'd pick her up at 7:00.
Just stepped off
a bus myself.
Daphne.
hey, you.
hey.
I know, I look awful.
I've been traveling
for, like, days,
and I haven't
gotten any sleep.
you look--you look fine.
what--what
are you doing here?
uh, well, I've been
to the house.
the house?
Mr. salinger,
half of these
inmates are yours.
oh, um, can you take
them inside with you,
Jeffrey,
just for 2 minutes,
please?
ok. Everybody,
let's go!
so, uh,
Bailey told me
that you're not living
at the house anymore.
but he wouldn't tell me
anything else.
uh, something going on?
where's Diana?
is she--
Daphne, look--
my mother died.
that's why
I was in Texas.
god, I'm sorry.
well, a lot of things
got clearer.
what I really want
got clearer.
and how dumb I was
for giving everything up.
that got a lot clearer.
and I kept thinking
about the 3 of us
and how happy
we really were.
daph...
actually, you
weren't that happy.
Mr. salinger!
you know what?
I got a free period
in half an hour,
like, 25 minutes,
actually.
then I'll come out,
and we'll sit down--
something wrong
with Diana?
no, no, no.
no, I swear.
really?
yes, she's fine,
and you'll--you'll
see her right away.
(class bell rings)
ok.
that's the second bell.
I'm sorry.
um, half an hour, ok?
all right.
I missed you...
both.
(Noisy chatter)
you look incredible.
what?
I said, I'm glad
we're doing this.
oh, me, too.
Perry.
hey, guys.
hey, what are you
doing here?
oh, I'm just here
with some friends.
what about you?
we're kinda on a date.
just having dinner.
I'm gonna go get us
something to drink.
so...
are you and Josh,
you-and-Josh?
why?
no reason.
I just, uh,
I thought you
didn't like him.
I never said
I didn't like him.
no, but I
seem to remember
a definite lack of
interest on your part,
of any interest
whatsoever.
in fact, I think
I remember you saying
something like--
what's your point?
you don't let any
moss grow, do you?
Perry, what's
that supposed--
here you go.
I should get back
to my friends,
and, uh, you kids
have fun.
We will.
jule,
you ready?
uh, yeah, ready.
canned corn.
cannot go camping
without canned corn.
park rangers spot-check
you for it when you
enter the grounds.
ok, I don't even
have enough room
for my laptop,
and that's kinda
the whole point.
ahem. Hey,
maybe you'll have
this lightning bolt
of inspiration
and just
Polish off the whole
application,
be home
in time to watch
the 10:00 news
in bed with me.
hmm, maybe.
but you know what?
i--i definitely think
this is the answer,
don't you?
I mean, going away,
peace and quiet, you know,
no distractions.
just focusing on
the task at--oh, Bailey,
don't--don't forget
Owen's appointment
with the psychologist.
got it covered.
tomorrow at 4:15.
good. Good.
I was saying something.
what was I just saying?
you were saying how
you were gonna focus on
the task at hand.
right. Exactly.
I mean,
it's not like I haven't
written a killer essay
before.
no kidding. You've
written a few for me.
right.
the only difference
is that when I was in my
killer-essay writing prime,
you know, I could just
shut the whole world out,
except for--is that
a mouse dropping?
what?
that! That
raisin-thingy. It is!
damn it!
the exterminator guy
was supposed to stop by
and check the traps,
you know, Tim, Tom, Ted.
oh, I'll call him
in the morning.
no, I will call
in the morning.
will you remember, Bailey,
or should I write it down?
Sarah, really.
Tim, Tom, Ted,
I got it covered, ok?
I'll take care of it.
ok, good.
I feel like I'm
forgetting something.
I'm telling you:
corn.
(telephone rings)
hello?
Charlie.
I told you, that's
all I told her,
and then she took off.
why, did she come by
the apartment or something?
here? No, I figure
she doesn't know
where here is.
no, I haven't
told her yet,
but I'm gonna
tell her right now.
ok, well, let me
know if she
gets in touch.
right.
isn't she cute,
all wet and
slippery?
let's keep you
all wet and
slippery.
let's just, like,
keep a spray can
of water
and squirt her
just so I can
towel her down.
Kirsten, listen, uh,
I don't want to make
too big a deal out of this,
but, uh...
wait, let me start over
because I think
this is a good thing.
ok, what's a good thing?
Daphne showed up today.
she's in San Francisco,
and she came to the school
looking for me.
well, what did she say?
what--what is she
doing here?
I was going to find out
everything.
I just had to drop off
my class and come back,
but she--she took off.
she does
want to see Diana.
i--i got that much.
wait, um,
see her or...
does she
want her back?
back? No.
does she
want you back?
Charlie, I have
a million questions.
this is our life we're
talking about here.
Kirsten, she doesn't
know about you and me yet.
ok, that's what I wanted
to have the time to tell her.
what did you mean,
this is a good thing?
well, just that
I did go down to L.A.
to get her back.
I mean, I always wanted
Diana to have her mother.
I mean--
you mean
her real mother.
Kirsten, no one can
take care of her--
I know what you mean
by that, Charlie.
you mean
her real mother.
why are we fighting
about this, ok?
we don't even know
what Daphne wants yet,
or even is she's
gonna stick around
or if she'll show up again.
no, we don't.
that doorbell
could ring now
or later on tonight
or a year from now,
and that's not
a good feeling, Charlie.
The tattoos come off
in, like, a week or two,
if you're hating them.
you didn't say anything
about my hair, either.
it's red.
I'm sorry. You know,
it's dark out,
I'm kinda colorblind.
you hate it, the hair
and the tattoos.
you're beautiful.
Cody, you really
like 'em?
not the hair
or the tattoos. You.
you don't have
to say that, Cody.
I can't help it.
ahem.
Cody, you didn't introduce me
to your little friend.
oh, hi.
hi, I'm Claudia.
wow, you're
all henna-handed.
big fan of Madonna's,
are ya?
our midnight set's up, Cody.
you should come watch.
please. Oh, please tell me
the midnight set's
starting early.
right on time.
ok, Bailey's gonna
actually kill me this time.
maybe if we hurry home,
I won't be that late.
ohh!
I'm...sorry.
you owe me a beer.
(knock on door)
(knock knock)
I want to know what you
meant by that statement.
oh, I'm sorry--
"you don't let any
moss grow, do you?"
that's what you said.
wait a second--
I want to know
what you meant.
look, I'm not gonna
have this conversation
out in the hallway, so...
what happened
with you and Josh?
nothing happened.
we had a fine time.
only the last hour
and a half of the date,
I wasn't even there.
I was totally in my head
wondering why you would
want to hurt me.
you think that's
what I wanted to do?
what were you thinking?
poor Julia?
poor pathetic Julia,
she's so desperate
and needy,
she'll go out with
a guy she doesn't like
just so she won't have to
spend the night on her own?
no, that is not
what I was thinking.
well, then what?
what? That I was
so freaked out
that we kissed,
that I'd throw myself at
the first available guy to
prove that I'm still straight?
no! Julia, look, what
do you want from me?
ok, because
whatever I do, I just--
I just can't seem
to get it right for you.
you want to know
what I was thinking
when I was looking
at you and Josh?
I was thinking,
"isn't that nice,"
you know?
wouldn't it be amazing,
if after all this time,
Josh and Julia might
actually be meant
for each other?
I don't think we are.
yeah, I thought
that, too.
and I also thought,
if you must know...
that Julia's in a hurry,
that's all.
in a hurry, yes,
for someone.
look, I'm not, uh,
I'm not good at this--
this people stuff.
I'm a writer, and
that's what I'm good at,
and I'm good at seeing
the writer in you,
and I do see one.
what does this
have to do--
however clueless they
are about everything else,
we know what's
inside of us.
and we know we can turn
inside of ourselves
to get what we need.
we have to.
you have to.
not to me,
not to anyone else,
but to yourself.
for a change, huh?
look...
it's not like
you don't need anybody,
like a friend or a lover,
we all do.
but just don't be
afraid of being alone.
I'm not. I'm--
because you
wouldn't be alone.
you'd be with
my friend Julia.
you can trust her.
she's the real thing.
Well, good night,
I guess.
sorry about all this.
hey, I'm the one
who took you out
for a date in
a parking lot.
so...
no, it was great.
I mean, I got to
meet your friends
and hang out with you.
and you gave me
the most amazing present.
I did?
well, you're about to.
Oh, no!
do you have any idea
what time it is?
you have any idea what
you sound like when you
speak to me that way?
what's the point of even
given you a curfew if you're
not gonna respect it, huh?
I couldn't have said it
better myself.
are you drunk?
are you high?
you are.
I can smell it.
did you get
her drunk, huh?
hey, man, look--
and you were driving.
how many did you have, huh?
leave him alone,
Bailey.
Claudia, go inside.
go inside!
I don't drink,
all right?
I can't,
so just back off.
just go home, Cody,
please.
I'll see you
tomorrow, ok?
you will not see him
tomorrow, Claudia.
Claudia, please listen to me.
I just don't think
you need to be making
a habit out drinking, ok?
no, it's not ok, Bailey.
just because you have
a problem with alcohol
doesn't mean I do.
yes, it does,
Claudia.
it runs
in our family.
Charlie's not an alcoholic,
Julia's not an alcoholic,
only you.
what is happening
to you, Claudia?
I don't even recognize
you anymore.
and out of all of us,
you and me...
you used to tell me
everything.
I was a good little girl,
wasn't I?
so what, so you
get your hair dyed
and you get tattooed
and--and all of a sudden
you think that makes
you a grownup?
because I got
to tell you, claud,
it's just the opposite.
you can tell me whatever
you want, Bailey,
but it's my life.
even at 16, there's nothing
you can do about it.
no, see, that's
where you're wrong.
don't threaten me, Bailey.
you're not my dad.
you're not even Charlie,
so stop trying to be.
I can take care of myself.
I've been doing that
for a while now.
Oh, excuse me. Hi. Can
I get a soda, please?
something very,
very caffeinated.
uh-oh! Curvy roads
got you dozing?
uh, I'm just
a passenger.
then I say kick-back
and take a snooze.
yeah, you wouldn't
say that if you had a
500-word essay to write.
look, the bus driver
said that I had to
transfer to another bus
in order to get within
walking distance of
the camper's station.
yeah, the grafton bus
will get you there.
it's gassing up
in the alley.
that'll be a dollar even.
oh, there you go.
do I have time for
a phone call?
mm-hmm.
thanks.
When did he say he
wanted to see Owen again?
ok, well, why don't you
wait till I get home to
make the appointment?
no, Bailey, it's just that
I know everybody's schedules
better than you do.
I am, too,
focused on my work.
in fact, I'm halfway
through my essay.
in fact, I am more
than halfway through.
hey, did you call
the exterminator?
Bailey...
oh! Yikes,
my bus is leaving.
yes, me, too.
I love you, too. Bye.
Hey.
oh, it's you.
hold on. I made a note
to myself about you.
I just want to make sure
I get this right.
uh, ok, here it is.
Uh, don't
be a jerk about last night.
"ok, maybe she
cut it a little short,
"but the main thing is
you had a good time
and, uh,
she had a good time?"
yes, she did, very.
so the plan was,
when I saw you again,
I wouldn't complain
about the early hour.
I'd just say thanks,
and how about we do it
again tonight?
I'd like to, Josh.
I'm sensing a "but"
in there, a "but"
or a "however."
could we just--
could we keep it vague?
vague, like,
uh, tomorrow,
or vague
like the next day?
no, vague, more like, um...
septemberish?
uh-huh, I get it.
no, Josh, you don't
'cause you're angry.
and if you understood--
you did this to me
once before, Julia.
no, it's different.
really? It sure doesn't
feel different.
ok, well, maybe
the end result
is the same,
but this time,
it is not me
choosing another guy,
it's me choosing me.
wait, you're not gonna,
like, break into song
or something, are you?
you know how they say you
have to embrace the things
that you fear most?
what, like spiders?
well, for me,
it's being alone.
that's what I fear most.
I've never really
completely been by myself.
maybe it's got something
to do with my parents dying
and feeling so alone
and the only answer
was just to never be alone.
makes sense, I guess.
yeah. And that pattern
started and it never stopped.
look, each guy
I've been with
has sorta been the answer
to the one who came before.
it wasn't me choosing
so much as ricocheting.
and it could go
on and on like that
if I don't stop and say,
"hey, where am I in this?
"Julie. Me. Who--
who am I without all
these people around me?
who am I on my own?"
and I'm sorry, I really am
'cause I like you a lot.
yeah, well...
I want you to know
I'm not gonna...
I don't think
I'll be able to,
like, wait
around for you
to figure
all this stuff out.
no, I know.
I know that's a risk.
and what if I give up
someone really great
and let them slip away?
and the old me would
and the new me--
or the trying-to-be
new me kinda thinks
I have to.
ok.
I'll see ya.
(Knock on door)
I'm coming.
Uh, Charlie
lives here with you.
yeah. Um...
did he, uh...
um...
uh, come in.
uh, no, actually,
I got the, uh,
got the number
from the school.
and I had to make up
a bunch of stuff
just to get it
from them.
it's kinda
sneaky, I know, but
sometimes, you know,
you got
to improvise.
well, you left yesterday,
and Charlie wanted to
tell you.
that he'd
gone back to you,
is that what he
wanted to say?
Daphne, he didn't think
you were coming back.
she's so beautiful,
isn't she?
Charlie said,
but I had no idea.
I couldn't even picture.
um, do you
want to hold her?
um, you still
married to Paul?
no.
that happened fast.
um, Charlie told me
about your mother,
and, um, I'm sorry.
is that all he said?
just "Daphne showed up,
her mother died.
what do you
think about that?"
no, he thinks it's really
good that you're here
for Diana,
he does.
he's always wanted Diana's
mother to be around.
4 people.
that's how many there
were at the funeral,
and that's including me
and her idiot boyfriend.
imagine a life
that lonely, kirst.
I am not, um, entirely
comfortable here, you know.
I know. And you know,
i--i think that there's
a lot of things that
we should talk about.
that--that is what I remember
about being around you all.
everybody's talking
all the time.
you know, Charlie actually
had a psychiatrist for me
to talk to.
he just wanted
to help you.
you know what?
tell Mr. helpful...
(sighs)
ahem.
tell him that
I will be staying at
my friend Nick and Tina's.
it's a couple of friends of
mine that Charlie really hates.
I want to cry
when I look at her.
hey.
Daphne...
she's yours.
and I never,
for one second,
pretended that
she was mine.
who said anything
about that?
hey.
Here.
thanks.
(door closes)
I can't believe
how stupid I am.
ok, so you lost your laptop.
I don't wanna say
big daddy bigbucks
will buy you a new one,
but isn't that the truth?
that is so
not the point, Claudia.
I'd spent days and days
trying to figure out
what I was gonna
write about myself,
and I make a start--
no, more than a start.
I practically finish
the whole damn thing,
and then I lost it.
Sarah, you're gonna
start over.
you're gonna do what I do
when my computer crashes.
no! It is too late, ok?
I should just take it
as a sign,
a sign that I am not
supposed to apply for
the stupid scholarship.
Hey, guys.
look what I got.
what did I tell you?
Mr. moneybags to the rescue.
Bailey, did you buy me
a new computer?
well, actually--
I told you not to do that.
I told you
it was not gonna help.
I lost everything.
I can't just go back
and remember it
when it took me all that
time to figure it out
in the first place.
did you not hear anything
that I said?
highly doubtful.
hey, will you
stay out of this,
please?
like you stay out of stuff
that has nothing to do
with you?
I'll see you later,
Sarah.
that's...
Bailey, that's
my old laptop.
yup. I made
some phone calls,
and they tracked it down
at that diner
next to the bus stop.
ta-da!
you're welcome.
Sarah, let me
label this for you:
joyous occasion.
what was lost
has now been found.
you just have to
hook this baby up
to a printer
and shazzam.
I can't do that.
you can't? Sure, you can.
where's the printer cable?
wait. Bailey...
I didn't write it.
I didn't write
anything.
but you said--
I know what I said,
ok? I lied.
I wasn't almost
through it.
I didn't write a word.
I couldn't.
well, ok, but you didn't
even have a chance.
by the time you'd arrived,
you lost your computer
so you had to
turn right around.
Bailey,
listen to me.
I can't write
this thing.
I have to answer
one simple question,
right?
who am I?
but if I have to
leave town and you
and my life
to figure that out,
what does that say?
that it's
really crazy here.
you needed some space.
you needed some time
to yourself.
do I? I mean,
is that what I want?
'cause I don't know
anymore.
I mean, I cant go
3 hours without
calling to check in
and make sure
that Owen's doctor's
appointment went ok
or that you
remembered to call
the exterminator.
that's because you love him
and you love me
and you take care of us.
so is that who I am?
sort of a mother,
but not really?
maybe a wife,
but not quite?
I mean, is that me?
'cause I don't know.
you know, maybe
I'm running away
from that.
maybe I'm afraid
to feel happy
in that role
because I'm 19,
and I feel like
I should want more
for myself.
Bailey...
maybe I can't
write this essay
because I know
exactly who I am,
and I'm just afraid
to say it out loud.
When I was in Texas,
I had this picture
in my head
about what was going on
back here.
you weren't living alone
and, uh,
still teaching,
and, uh...
happy enough, you know?
and I was thinking,
I was thinking
I can go back there
and I can make him
even happier
when I'm strong enough
and when I'm ready.
and that's why
you came back.
I know. What was I
thinking, right?
how totally off-base
of me that me coming
back here
would actually
make you happy.
daph...
time passed and,
you know, when it does,
stuff changes.
it's not that much time,
Charlie,
when you really
think about it.
ok, listen, you...
you gotta hear this, ok?
'cause, uh, Kirsten and me,
we're together.
and that's changed
too many times,
and it's not changing
anymore.
ok? That's it.
and I'm not telling you this
to hurt you.
I just...
I just want you
to know.
fine.
well, let's talk
about Diana.
good, good.
I want to because she--
because that is
the one thing
that I can look at,
and I can say,
"I did that."
and I haven't lost it,
and I haven't
screwed it up,
even though
I almost did.
but, um...
I'm back now and, uh...
and if it can't be
for the both of you,
then I am back for her.
and I'm glad, daph,
because I wanted her
to have her mother then,
and I want it now.
so however much
you want to be around her,
just tell us,
and...
us? Meaning
you and Kirsten.
Listen, just start by
coming by and spending
some time with her.
ok? Maybe tonight...
if tonight's good.
hey.
being helpful, huh?
might as well be.
writing, huh?
mmm. Failing to.
pretending to.
I just pushed the help key
to help me solve
my identity crisis.
sorry.
Claud.
what are you
doing here?
well, you see,
my boyfriend,
he's the bass player
in the doom patrol,
and I never miss
a doom patrol gig.
yeah, but
what about Bailey?
I thought
you were grounded
until...
I don't want you
to worry about Bailey, ok?
I'm not.
"You asked me
what I wanted from you,
"and the truth is,
you were right.
"I wanted too much,
"more than I had any right
to ask for.
"but somehow, you still
managed to give me
what I needed.
"you believed in me,
and more importantly,
"you made me want
to believe in myself.
"and for that,
I can't thank you enough.
your friend, Julia."
(cooing)
what is that? Shh...
(Diana fidgets)
Is--is she hungry?
what time did she eat last?
I don't know.
Kirsten will know.
Kirsten?
When did you
feed her last?
after dinner or...
same as always.
but that new
squash compote,
I don't think
it fills her up.
she wouldn't take
very much.
if you want to give her
a bottle...
you going out?
uh, to a movie, yeah.
have a good time.
Kirsten,
wait a minute.
a movie would be
a really good thing
right now, Charlie.
well...
don't see anything
we were gonna see
together.
together?
yes. Together.
I see what I see,
Charlie.
that's a family
up there,
you and Daphne
and your baby.
no. Listen to me.
I know
what you're feeling,
and I understand it,
but don't do it, ok?
because we talked,
and Daphne,
Daphne gets it about us,
all right? This is...
that is definitely not
what she's here for.
she is here for Diana,
and that is it.
I know you've talked.
then you know
that there's nothing
to worry about, right?
please. Please say
that you know that.
I can't say what
I don't feel, Charlie.
really, I just...
it's best if I go
for a while, ok?
I'll be back
in a couple hours.
ok.